why sayonarane?
|
hitoribocchi de iru to
waratte, waratte |
ひとりぼっちでいると
笑って笑って |
when i'm on my own smile, smile |
=from the opening theme of one of my beloved childhood addictions,
an old anime series by the name of candy candy, more...=
breaking it up
sayonara quite simply means goodbye, while ne will require more than just a direct translation. it's an expression with many possible translations, best described as asking the listener for a confirmation -- similar to the way we might use expressions such as okay?, right?, or yes? -- when used in the form of a question. when used at the beginning of a sentence, however, this word takes on different connotations. for example, it might be used the way we use hey..., listen..., say..., don't you think..?, and probably in ways that i have yet to learn.
so basically, the way i read the phrase sayonara ne is as a way of saying: goodbye...okay? that may not make much sense to you, but it really strikes a chord with me. it makes me think of someone ready to part ways and thinking, "it's time to say goodbye, okay?" ...whether this is parting ways with a loved one, a feeling, or a way of being isn't defined when i read it. i very much like that sort of melancholic touch, it almost feels romantic to me (i enjoy tragic stories and sad endings, btw). it also reminds me of the way i feel about a lot of my past, a bitter-sweet parting, and that's why i chose it.
more about japanese
did you know? ne and nee (pronounced the same, the latter only having the vowel held longer) aren't considered as being the same word by some people. in my opinion (which, btw, you shouldn't really trust), i think they must at least have derived from the same word/expression, and evolved into having different meanings depending on how they're said and/or used.
please note that the ne / nee (ね/ねえ) i'm referring to is written in hiragana - a basic alphabet, if you will, primarily serving as the structure of their phonetic system, but also used for words with no powerful meaning (ex: at, here, where, this, etc). this is as opposed to kanji, which are symbols borrowed (okay, stolen) from the chinese language to represent words with a concept or deeper meaning (ex: sword, year, water, moon, love, sleep, return, etc). a single kanji can represent one or more syllables (read: hiragana) because they are words in themselves (the same can't always be said about hiragana symbols, each of which represent only one syllable and don't necessarily mean anything on their own). the reason i'm explaining this is because there are other words pronounced "ne" that can mean something entirely different if written in kanji (ex: 寝, pronounced "ne," means "sleep"). the japanese have one other "alphabet" (yes, another) called katakana.
katakana is a clone of hiragana in every way except the way it's written, and serves one major function - to spell out foreign words, roughly translating them into their phonetic system to help them understand the way it should be pronounced. this often deviates from the way the foreign word is spelled in the original language (especially english, in which a single letter can be pronounced in so many ways - a concept not familiar to the japanese). for example the way the "spell out" the word candy in katakana is kyandii. this is the closest they can get to emulating our pronunciation using their phonetic system.
english plays a big part in every day language use, you'd be surprised how many english words an average japanese person knows without having to have taken any classes. this is because many words have been adopted into their language for obvious reasons (ex: computer - konpyuutaa; basket ball - basuketto booru; e-mail - meeru, etc), for use in titles of books/dramas/movies/etc and company names (ex: play station - pureei suteishon; paradise kiss - paradaisu kissu, etc), just for cute/cool-ness factor (ex: pink - pinku, sexy - sekushii, etc), and for many other reasons/uses! nowadays katakana is also used as a way to put emphasis on a word (especially in magazines and ads), much like italics. sometimes people even use katakana on a word that's completely japanese, just to be cute. xD personally i wish they wouldn't, though, because it has been the source of many-a-confusion for me.
important! i am not japanese, i was not raised in japan, and i haven't even been to japan. thus, my explanations are from what i have learned through experience, classes and independent research (which i have done a lot of because i love the language). so, although i hope this has been educational to some people, please don't expect this to be 100% accurate and, most importantly, do not use me as a source for anything even close to official (if anything, you can site/quote me as an opinion or theory only). feel free to do some research from more reliable sources, or ask someone who is a fluent/native speaker. and be sure to let me know if you learn anything new!
about the layout
version 02; KONchan ☆ paraDISE
subject; H!P; j-pop/variety idol company
people; konno asami
program; photoshop CS3; textmate; CSS edit
best viewed; firefox or safari @ 1024x768+
first time; using header with rotating images; overlapping divs; making a hello! project layout ♥
had lots of help from bryan again, but i was able to do a lot on my own too.
i was dying over how freakin' TIRED of my old layout i was (i can't believe i left it up for 2 years! ><). i couldn't stand it anymore, so i opened photoshop and started on the first thing that came to my mind (even though i didn't have any good ideas about what the new layout should look like). i had it stuck in my head to use an image of KonKon, but the only one i was inspired by was the pink one you see in the middle now. *points up*
it's a cute image but i dind't want a very pink layout, so i tried to figure out a way around that. that's when i though of adding some extra images to surround the main one, but when it came down to it i just couldn't decide which images to use! KonKon has soooo many cute image to choose from, so in the end i decided i don't have to choose. i'll just have rotating images and put in all the KonKon i want! then i added colors here and there on the header and in the layout, so we have more than just pink. i hope that came across!
the decorations on the polaroids are a mixture of accent fonts i downloaded a long time ago, and hand-drawn stuff. they took ages to finish, lol. the polaroids themselves are a texture i borrowed from bryan. once i did the dashed lines around the picture of the back of KonKon's head (love that picture ♥), i decided i'd be using more dashed lines in the layout...and thus the rest of the site was born! the sidebar is kind of weak, i'll see if i can improve it soon.
the name of this version is KONchan ☆ paraDISE, which came from thinking along the lines of "KonKon explosion!!" and the weird capitalization came from the way i wrote "SAYONARANE.net" on the header. and the star is there because it's just cute, just like KonKon. ♥
past layouts:
version 01; nee, nana...
series; NANA; manga
characters; oosaki nana; komatsu nana
program; photoshop CS2; textmate
best viewed; firefox or safari @ 800x600+
first time; using divs (former table whore); using forms/dodosmail
relied heavily on fiancé, bryan, for re-introduction into the world of coding
funny thing is, i chose the header image because i love it, and i also love the series (recommend it to all!) without realizing the coincidental correlation to my domain name. the phrase nee, nana... is the start of pretty much every monologue used to introduce a chapter in this series. therefore, it was quite befitting of my domain name...once i realized that, i decided to name this version nee, nana. cute, ne?
i'm not too fond of the color combination, it works more in the header image more than it does in the rest of the website. but seeing as how this is the first layout i've done in years (unless you count my livejournal), i didn't want to do a whole lot in case i failed miserably. at least i don't detest it, but i wonder how long that will last. i'm not ready to give up the ne/nee concept, though, so if there's a change the likelihood that i will use NANA again is pretty high.
candy candy
candy candy is the story of a young orphan girl (is it just me, or are all the old series about orphans?) who goes from one tragedy to the next. basically. but it's much better than just that!
candy and me
the thing that made candy, the orphan girl, special to me is that no matter how harsh her circumstances were, she always stayed strong. in fact, though she often got the worst of things her main focus was always to help those in need. seeing that such a young girl (the series spans years, so we see her from a baby to about age 14) could do these things was a huge inspiration for me. i was very young when i went through some things i wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy, and i had to make some decisions a kid should never have to even think about. but i managed to stay healthy, happy and strong because in the back of my mind i had that image of candy. if she could go so through so much and still find happiness, so could i.
candy and annie
okay, i'll stop being sentimental now and tell you about some of the juicy bits of the story that make you love/hate it. to start off you need some background story. baby candy - then nameless - was abandoned anonymously at an orphanage called pony's home. it was a snowy night, so the two ladies that owned the small, but comforting home among the hills, sister maria and pony, decided to take her in and named her candice white. later that same night, while introducing baby candy to the other children of the orphanage, another baby's cries could be heard. they went to investigate and found another baby girl, hidden among the bushes. of course, sister maria and pony immediately took her in as well, and named her annie.
from then on candy and annie became the best of friends. they spent every day together, and even celebrated their birthdays together (having unknown birthdays and being found on the same night, it was only appropriate). however, the more they grew the more you could see they had different personalities. while candy was care-free, mischievous and a bit of a tomboy, annie was shy, soft-spoken and more dependent. as they grew older, it was clear that even though candy hoped they would grow up together in the orphanage, annie deeply desired to be adopted and have a family.
finally, one day, annie's wish came true. she was adopted into a proud, rich family who hoped to turn her into a true lady. many mixed feelings came with the news that annie would be leaving, but eventually candy accepted it and wished her nothing but happiness. the day came for tearful goodbyes, and they promised to see and write to each other as often as possible. that is, until, a few weeks later candy received a letter from annie that read: this is the last time i will write to you.
candy's prince
it turned out that annie's new family wished to keep her adoption a secret, and so annie would have to cut all affiliation with pony's home, including her friendship with candy. completely heartbroken and feeling betrayed, candy ran as far as she could, finally resting at the foot of a large tree that sat on top of a hill. she cried her heart out, until she heard a gentle voice say, don't cry...i bet you're much more beutiful when you smile.
startled, candy looked up to see a warm face smiling down at her. it was a charming young blonde boy, wearing what seemed to be traditional scottish clothes, and holding a set of bagpipes (note: i know this sounds silly, but if you see the series yourself it just looks sweet). he extended his hand and helped her up. he wiped her tears, told her she should always smile. he left her with a handkerchief with the a golden crest embroidered on it and left, leaving candy feeling as if she had just been dreaming. she went back home, feeling someone better and finally arrived at the conclusion that if annie can find happiness with a new family, she might be able to as well.
candy's adoption
a few years later, a family by the name of andley showed interest in adopting candy. candy was on her best behavior (for once, she usually enjoyed repulsing those who showed interested in adopting annie or herself) and for once, was excited about the idea of having a family. she was officially adopted into the family and became candice andley with the prospect of being a companion for the only daughter in the family, eliza. eliza was the same age as candy, but she was also a spoiled, jealous, high-maintenance, selfish little princess. what's worse is that she had a younger brother, neil, who was just as bad as and just as ready to cause trouble for candy.
from the moment candy stepped foot in the house (mansion, rather), eliza and neil disapproved of her adoption. they worked quite feverishly to make her look bad at every chance they got. candy was never at peace, always getting in trouble or having to resist standing up for herself. it was one incident after another of accusations, set-ups, tricks, and fights. the only rest candy got was from the many servants of the house, who could sympathize with her and could see she had a good heart. this continued until their mother was convinced she had made a mistake of adopting candy - now a delinquent in her eyes. finally, she made the decision to turn candy into another servant. she was made to leave her room and start living in the barn, sleeping with the horses.
candy's enounter
this depressed candy at first, but she soon realized that this change of events made it so that she didn't have to see eliza or neal as often as before. she became closer to the other servants, made friends with the animals she cared for, and was starting to get adjusted to her new life. however, eliza and neil were still up to their old tricks. every once in a while they would find a way to embarrass her again, or arrange a stunt to make her look bad when important guests payed a visit. on one such night, candy got so upset that she was ready to run away from the andley house. she ran past the dense woods that surrounded the mansion until she was too tired to run anymore. she knew she's have to back, she didn't have any of her belonging or anywhere to go, but for the moment she just wanted to sit there and cry until her tears ran dry.
then she heard a familiar voice. don't cry...i bet you're much more beautiful when you smile. with a start candy looked up to the that same warm face from years ago, her prince of the hill. he looked just the same, only this time he wasn't in the scottish robes, he was sitting up against a gate of what seemed to be another mansion. but wait, how could this be? while she had grown over the years, he seemed to be exactly the same. he also wasn't showing any signs of recognizing her. she decided not to mention anything about the prince, since it had been so long her mind could be playing tricks on her, making her think that's what the prince looked like.